Antonio & Alexia's Blog


Crashing a Strangers Funeral ... to Bury Your Demons, Should You Do It?


There are many ways to get rid of a bad habit. My aunt Carmen however, found a way to interfere with someones funeral to bury her demons. This technique might not work for everybody, but here is the story just in case someone wants to try it.

While rushing to get home today, I was stopped "dead on the road" so-to-speak by... a funeral parade. It reminded me of an important funeral that gets talked about in almost all of my family reunions.

My aunt Carmen (her real name) is one of those women who can get almost everything right in life except a good man. An attractive 40 something, twice divorce, active person, Carmen one day announced to the family that she had finally found the right man, she was in love... again. Welcome Alfonzo (His real name.) And after they met they had the most wonderful time of their lives... all 3 weeks of them! That is when they had the first big fight and parted ways for a few days... only to re-connect a few days later.

For the next year & half, they fought, split and reconciled almost weekly. She would find him with other women all over town, he would tell her he will be in one place, and then she will find him in another place with a female companion.

All come to an abrupt end when she discovered he had 2 other girlfriends, a pregnant wife... and two kids! Aunt Carmen loved this guy so much, she kept coming back to him, time and time again, but this time it was different, her heart could not be mended anymore, in their last fight, she even threatened to kill him!

On a rainy Saturday afternoon aunt Carmen got dressed in all black including a veil and drove towards the cemetery. She waited for a couple of hours crying inconsolably, all alone in her car. Finally here it comes, a funeral procession entered, cars and people followed the hearse, my aunt got out of her car and joined the mourners, she cried as hard as any family member of the deceased, she even participated on throwing a handful of dirt onto the casket, she cried so hard that it moved people to gave her their condolences.

The picture we got from her was that she did look and felt miserable in that graveyard, soaking wet, with dirt all over her, swollen eyes from crying, and the family of the deceased trying in a hostile manner to find out who she was. To this day, we do not know whether the deceased was a man or a woman, and as she told us the story, we were in tears... tears of pain!

 We were laughing out so hard, wondering what the grieving      family thought of this stranger in their funeral. But for Aunt, she had buried her man. For all intends and purposes he was for her  as dead as a doorknob, granted we all knew he was very much  alive and well, frolicking perhaps with yet another woman.

The big test come just 2 weeks after that funeral when aunty Carmen and a girlfriend of hers come face to face with Alfonzo and his date at a restaurant. He come to her and asked her how she was doing, she looked at him directly in his eyes and asked him who he was.

He was horrified when she told him that she had just attended his funeral! The man of her dreams was dead and buried forever; the stranger in front of her was no one she could recognize. Her heart had finally healed. From that day on, anytime I see a funeral parade go by, I wonder if the cadaver is the only thing being buried that day.


The Realtors In Motion       Antonio & Alexia Cardenas   

                  "The Realtors In Motion" 

         CRS, GRI, E-Pro Certified. SFR (Short Sales, Forclosure Resource) Serving the east shores of the San Francisco Bay, Alameda county: specially the following cities: Castro Valley, San Leandro, San Lorenzo, Hayward, Oakland, Pleasanton & Dublin.

                  Visit us on line at: or call (510) 326-4263

                     Call us, We'll come and TANGO with you!

Comment balloon 2 commentsAntonio & Alexia Cardenas • February 21 2010 04:12PM


What an interesting post. I have never thought that maybe people bury bad habits, relationships and other things at a funeral.

Posted by Michael A. Caruso (Surterre Properties) over 10 years ago

Yes, Michael, we do not know where she come up with this idea, but it worked for her, a bit "out of the box" I think. thanks for the visit.


Posted by Antonio & Alexia Cardenas, "The Realtors In Motion" (Alameda County - San Leandro, CA.) over 10 years ago